No idea when this was taken, or if there was any followup, but the video at Shabooty.com is insane nonetheless. A few kids on what appears to be an LA subway train are teasing a large woman (referred to in the video title as a crackhead hooker) for about five minutes, who seems to be egging them on. A little over halfway through this clip, she pulls what is assumed to be pepperspray from her purse and sprays it at one of the kid’s eyes.

(unable to embed here – click here to watch)

The Untidy Germaphobe

Today in LA fashion I bring you the “Untidy Germaphobe,” as spotted on the Metro Red Line to Union Station. Yeah, yeah, I know. Criticizing fashion on the Metro is too easy, but I go with what I know.

When I first saw the “Untidy Germaphobe” sitting across from me on the train, I only noticed his surgical mask.

“He must be wearing that because of the poor air quality due to the Station Fire,” I thought to myself, smirking arrogantly at my own reflection in my iPod.

Then my eyes moved down to his hands, which were tautly sheathed in blue latex gloves, perfectly color coordinated to match his jaunty mask.

“Hmm. Germaphobe,” I nodded, feeling quite satisfied that I had him all figured out.

Glancing over one more time, I took in the rest of his ensemble, which continued to vex me for at least three more minutes, or however long it takes to get from Hollywood & Highland to Sunset & Vermont.  The gloves and the mask seemed to match a Mysophobic personality disorder sure, but what the hell was going on with the rest of his scene? First of all, his clothes and boots were visibly filthy. Not approved Germaphobe attire. Second, he smelled like he had not showered in quite some time. Definitely the type of violation that could get you kicked out of Germaphobe Camp.

Taking all of the above into consideration, I finally narrowed this guy down to one of three stereotypes, placing the most weight of course on his peculiar outfit (who wears a snow hat in LA during a heat wave?):

1. Recently discharged Vietnam War veteran

2. Construction worker from the 1950’s

3. Anti-government militia soldier

I can’t decide which one, so I’m leaving it up to you fine readers to decide. What’s this dude’s deal? Feel free to offer your own guess.

LASnark just broke the news about Governor Schwarzenegger’s plan to fix California. Since the elected guys have no idea what to do, they’re asking the internet.

The Governor would like your suggestions via Twitter. Simply post your idea, followed by #MyIdea4CA. I tweeted mine, which referred back to an earlier post here on Metblogs. All suggestions become part of an ongoing forum at myidea4ca.com.

Why didn’t Villaraigosa think of this?

The state is broke. Unemployment is high. So, why are we still outsourcing production of our rail cars to other countries?

Curbed reports that delegates from 12 Korean companies are on their way to bid on a $45-billion contract for our state’s high speed rail network. I’m sure they’re all fine companies. So are the ones from Germany and Italy. But, what if Los Angeles got into rail manufacturing? The city claims that it wants to be the “clean tech” leader.

Los Angeles is home to the largest port complex in the nation, the world’s fifth busiest airport, the country’s largest municipal utillity, world-class research universities, an unparalleled workforce, and the largest manufacturing center in the nation. From pipe-fitters and electricians to engineering PhDs and Nobel Laureates, the business and labor communities are teaming up to make Los Angeles the most productive place in the nation for cleantech. The City is building on these assets with billions of dollars of investment and attractive incentives to make Los Angeles the destination for the cleantech industry.

Would a clean tech high speed rail network fit the bill?

If Los Angeles, and the state of California want to get back on track, we should start building trains. Here. In our town. California needs them. So does Florida, the Midwest, and the rest of the nation. An American high-speed rail network – made for Americans, by Americans.

We’ve done this before. Why not do it again?

Not Smart. Not Simple. Secure? One can hope!

A few days ago I railed about how patently stupidious it is trying to get a new Transit Access Pass (TAP) card for use on Metro buses and trains. As I left that first post, I had been told by a TAP customer service representative that the only place I could obtain a TAP card and load it with a  cash amount (as opposed to an expiration-driven monthly pass for $62) was Union Station.

It just so happened that on Tuesday I found myself at Union Station to catch the No. 439 bus to work and decided to see if that was indeed the case. Sure enough and to no real surprise, it wasn’t. The clerk at the counter there parroted the TAP rep.

“But,” I countered, “on the TAP website it says that a card can be used to store cash value!”

“Metro isn’t set up to do that,” she answered.

“Will it ever be?”

“I don’t know, sir.”

“Doesn’t that strike you as the lamest most ironic thing ever in the history of mass transportation and fare management to offer an access pass that people can’t use?”

(more…)

Tom LaBonge is taking the credit for negotiating with local church’s to return the LA Marathon to a Sunday next year, when the route will take runners from Dodger Stadium to the Pacific Ocean.

Pressure from assorted houses of worship caused the Los Angeles Marathon to move to Memorial Day this year, as church’s complained that marathon related road closures resulted in reduced attendance.

While the return to Sunday during a cooler period will bring unanimous satisfaction to L.A.’s diverse running community, the new route may not. But what do you think?

As far back as 1995 when the base MTA fare was $1.35, savvy passengers could hook themselves up with one of the unsung bargains in the city — a bag of 10 tokens for $9 — and save themselves 40 45 cents with every ride. Then came 2003 when the MTA cagily did away with transfers, dropped the fare to $1.25 and debuted the $3 all-day sucker (now $5). As that dreaded Dawn of the Day Pass approached I did a genius thing: I went into my local liquor store and loaded up on several bags worth of never-say-die tokens, and seeing as how I’m only a now-and-again patron, in the six-years since I’ve been enjoying the convenience and discount of a one-coin, 90-cent fare whenever I board a bus or train.

Alas, the eventual day has finally come where I find myself down to my last few tokens, and while they’re still sold in bags of 10 it’s at $12.50, no longer at any discount. With that bargain gone as well as the news that fare gates are starting to sprout up at various rail stations (and I hate having to deal with having exact change), I figured the time was right for me to get myself upgraded to one of them newfangled reloadable Transit Access Pass (TAP) cards that are all the rage.

Wrong.

But off to metro.net I went where I clicked on the TAP card section and was taken to a Base Fares & Tokens page that gave me another link to a TAP Card page that finally assured me I could purchase one online, and gave me another link to do so. Yet when I clicked it up popped this thing of fail, of course:

(more…)

There’s a story in Blogdowntown today about the new streetcar system planned for Downtown Los Angeles. With a projected opening date of 2014, Los Angeles Streetcar, Inc. is currently looking for input on routes through the area.

Los Angeles Streetcar, Inc. LASI. The LASI Train.

The unfortunate naming pales in comparison to other civic blunders elsewhere. The best example to date is in Seattle, where riders of the South Lake Union Trolley revel in “Riding the S.L.U.T.”

Still, I cannot imagine a better moniker for a city that whines about having to walk more than a block to get somewhere. And let’s not forget about the marketing possibilities. Ozzy on board for the inaugural ride?

“Ladies and gents, we’re now arrivvving at 7th streetddd asc aburn jsuxxk dfrr.. i cannn dff foowww… fjrdka”

I can’t wait to ride the LASI Train. I just hope there’s going to be a station next to my living room.

Where you should not be tomorrow - click to biggify

I think it’s pretty much a given that, unless you’re Will or anyone else who won a ticket to Michael Jackson’s memorial service downtown tomorrow morning, you ought to absolutely, completely, totally, and definitively avoid going downtown at all costs tomorrow.  If you still need convincing, the LAPD reports that it will barricade the Staples Center and the Nokia Theater within a large perimeter bounded by Olympic, Flower, Pico and Blaine.  The MTA plans to detour over 20 bus lines that serve the downtown area; the big list is over here.  For those of you still hoping to get tickets, eBay is purportedly removing profit-seeking scalpers listing their winnings, though for a cool $10 plus shipping, you can buy a photo of MJ plus an email informing someone that they did not win the raffle.  Geesh, everyone’s out to make a buck these days.

I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride it where I like.

Guest, May 20, 2009, 4:31 p.m., My Commute Sucks

For an ever so brief period, I lived in Los Feliz and commuted to Century City for work – at least an hour each way, every day.  After doing this for a summer, I decided: 1) there is absolutely no optimal way to get from one end of Santa Monica Blvd. to the other; and 2) this is ridiculous.  Those of us who are weary of our crappy commutes can go the Howard Beale route and scream frustrations out of their browswer windows on the Transportation for America’s My Commute Sucks website.  Launched on National Bike to Work Day last Friday, the site gives drivers, Los Angeles and otherwise, the chance to submit their war stories as part of a bid to convince The Powers That Be (i.e., Congress) to enact sensible and sustainable transportation options.   The site doesn’t have a search function, nor does it categorize vents by city so we can compare war stories, but from what I understand, these functionalities will be coming soon.

Photo courtesy ~db~ via the Metblogs Flickr pool.