Win Free Derby Dolls Tickets (plus a special bonus prize)
L.A. Derby Dolls in action. Photo by Stalkerazzi f/8, courtesy of laderbydolls.
The L.A. Derby Dolls return to the Doll Factory on Saturday, April 18 as the Sirens battle the Varsity Brawlers. Because I love you L.A., I want to share the roller derby awesomeousity. (That’s right, my fun is so awesome I have to make up new words to describe just how awesome it is.) I’ve got free tickets for you. Read on…
If you’ve learned anything about me since I began writing for MetBlogs, it’s that at heart, I am still an adolescent. No…wait. If you’ve learned two things about me, it’s that I’m still an adolescent and I love the L.A. Derby Dolls. And our chief weapon is surprise. Suprise and fear. Come in again…
Really, what’s not to love? Roller derby is a fast paced, full-contact, action packed sport. And the Derby Dolls? In addition to being poised, refined, attractive young ladies, those girls are bad-asses and that is sexy as hell. The bouts at the Doll Factory are some of the most exciting sporting events in Los Angeles. My only wish would be for more.
If you’ve ever been to a bout at the Doll Factory, you already know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t, you don’t know what you’ve been missing. Either way, you’ll want to follow me past the jump to find out how you get your free tickets (and nifty bonus prize)…
The contest this time around is based on roller derby haiku. In the comments, leave a haiku (follow 5-7-5 format) about anything derby-related; could be about your favorite Doll, what you like best about the sport, whatever. For example:
L.A. Derby Dolls
Poised and lovely bad-asses
Best thing on eight wheels
As you can see, my own haiku skills are somewhat rudimentary, so don’t worry if you’re not a poet-savant. All entries will be considered and appreciated. Feel free to enter as many times as you like. Bonus points if you can work in some of those fantastic derby names from the last contest (or make up new ones.)
This contest is a little harder than the last one, so the pay-off is bigger, too. Second place will get two free tickets to the April 18 bout. First place wins two free tickets and a Derby Dolls t-shirt AND the bonus prize. The bonus prize (suggested by my Varisty Brawler pal TaeKwon Ho) is a hip check or a body block from a Derby Doll, to be administered by the Sirens’ Cannon Doll X. Wow! I think the bonus prize may be optional, but I would totally take the hit if I were you. That’s a Facebook-worthy picture if I ever heard of one.
The contest will run until 5:00pm pdt on Wednesday, April 15. I’ll pick a winner soon after that. Many thanks to the LA Derby Dolls, TaeKwon Ho and Cannon Doll X for providing tickets, t-shirt and violence. As usual, this event will sell out; probably at least a day or two in advance. Don’t wait until it’s too late. You can purchase tickets through the link at the Dolls’ website.
I’m really looking forward to your roller derby haiku. I’m sure you’ll all make it incredibly difficult to pick a winner for this contest, just like the others. Good luck to everyone and I’ll see you at the Doll Factory!
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DAMN. I’ve always wanted to win the chance to get beat up! I’ll sit this one out, though, since I won last time and my haiku skillz are teh sucks:
Writing a haiku
To win Derby Dolls tickets
My soul is chaos
fishnets with wheelies
rolling on the boards of wood
yikes that hurt ouch bruise
Oh my! I do cry
The Dolls make me sigh, as they
Fly by in Hi-Fi
The pain of defeat
San Diego pummeling
Bacon wrapped hot dogs
sweeeet another contest! ok i am not bitter at all for losing the last one LOL. ok i kind of am. derby dolls rule!
drinking a beer
watching derby dolls
life is good
Sirens flashing by
in pursuit of Brawlers’ pack.
Who will win the bout?
A skate in the teeth,
I am splattered on the track.
Call off the jam, please.
Pools of blood & beer
Fast women on rusty skates
Derby Dolls kick ass.
Varsity Brawlers,
An ass-kicking awaits you.
Respect the Sirens.
LA Derby Dolls
Do not play well with others;
No rollerblades here.
Secret recipe:
Beer, blood, skates & fast women.
Serve with a vengeance.
Dear Cannon Doll X,
Truly a wonder on wheels
Where’s your other eye?
Darn. Two months too late.
Would "Susan Beef Anthony"
have won me tickets?
You all rock. I knew you’d make this difficult again. Keep ‘em coming!
L.A. DERBY DOLLS
Access to elbows: Caught ya lookin"!
Oh, Sarkastika
Doth anyone dare challenge?
My penis is scared
Bitches crashing now
On 8 speedy wheels no less,
Derby war begins
Big Hair and Big Tits
Whirring wheels screeching also
Hell Hath No Fury
Wheels setting fire to the rink
Ain’t all about tits and ass
Derby bitches rock
You guys are awesome!!! Some of these are really funny!! nice job! and just for the record.. I do have 2 eyes… lol
Love and Bruises,
Cannon Doll X
#xXx
of the LADD SIRENS
Thanks, everybody. The haiku were all great, and the winners have been notified. Looks like there may still be a few tickets left at the Dolls’ website, so get ‘em now before they sell out. Then, come find me at the Doll Factory tomorrow night and say hi.